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Borderline Personality Disorder How to Spot it - A Checklist, by Joe Navarro
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Based on former FBI Special Agent Joe Navarro’s experience as a criminal profiler and behavior specialist, "Borderline Personality Disorder How to Spot it - A Checklist", provides the average person the tools necessary for identifying and assessing individuals who suffer from Borderline Personality Disorder.
This short practical guide and checklist includes the 100 behaviors that are closely associated with this prevalent disorder. It is easy to use and intended for the average layperson: you truly don't have to be a psychiatrist to use this.
This short booklet will give you insight into this disorder by examining behaviors that may not be recognizable to you at first but have proven over time to be part of the Borderline Personality Disorder. Practical, fast, easy to read and simple to understand, this guide sheds light on a disorder that afflicts many with serious consequences for the rest of us.
- Sales Rank: #459257 in eBooks
- Published on: 2013-02-15
- Released on: 2013-02-15
- Format: Kindle eBook
Most helpful customer reviews
15 of 19 people found the following review helpful.
Disagree with Reviewer Mr. Lee
By Kelly
I have to disagree with the last reviewer. The point of this book is not to offer tips and tools on how to deal with the disorder, either as sufferer or victim. It is just what the title states: how to spot someone with BPD. Nowhere in the book does he stigmatize or criticize those with the disorder. He simple lists, based on his research and experience, how a typical BPD sufferer acts. He's listing symptoms, not cures.
My ex-significant other is an undiagnosed BP and I can state from personal experience that the relationship was as close to emotional hell as I can imagine. Yes, it is a debilitating disorder, for both those with it AND those forced to live with it. After years of constantly trying to navigate the minefield of her rages I knew something was wrong, but had no idea what. A book like this would have been an enormous help at the time. Frankly, I find it somewhat irritating that some insist that because the sufferer can't help doing what they do, those involved with the BP are somehow being unfair or stigmatizing or possess a lack empathy if we seek a way out. There is a reason BPD is one of the hardest disorders to treat, namely that by the very nature of the disorder those with it refuse to believe that THEY have a problem.
As a counter to Mr. Lee's comments, I will state that this book is simply a tool to determine if you're facing the disorder, most likely from the perspective of someone involved with a BP. It is tragic that so many BPD victims commit suicide, yes. And the emotional pain they feel daily is horrible, yes. But a definition of the disorder is not an idictment, it is just that: a definition. If you think you're involved with someone with BPD, read this book. If it seems that you can NEVER do right by your partner; that everything seems to be your fault; that (s)he goes from happy one minute to enraged the next; if events are manipulated, mis-represented, or simply invented to make them the victim and you the bad-guy, read this book. If the first thing you do when you wake up, or arrive home, is to think "I wonder what the mood today is going to be," read this book. It will not tell you what to DO about it, but it may very well point you in a direction.
I would venture a guess that Mr. Lee believes that because the BP cannot help it, those victimized by a BP are not allowed to state that they dislike it. At any rate, defining the disorder does not exacerbate it, not does it shame the sufferers if those who care for them seek information about it. Mr. Navarro's book is simply a brief, almost clinical, definition of what the disorder is; nothing more.
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful.
a book for the layman - to avoid or get out of hell
By N H
This is a book for laymen- not professionals, though it does use language from the DSM. It is not for a professional to diagnose a patient. It is for the victims or potential victims to make sense out of the hell in which they are ensnared. It wouldn't surprise me if a lot of the negative reviews on this book are from people who have BPD and hate everything Mr Navarro says because they hate being exposed.
Borderline is a tricky thing to diagnose because out of the 9 symptoms in the DSM-IV and V, they need to have 5...so from one BPD to another the symptoms may vary considerably. Plus, the point is not so much the label of borderline that matters, it is the behaviors. The author uses the 9 symptoms from the DSM-IV and expands on them using more layman language that is accessible to non-mental health professionals. The DSM-V has an evolved set of diagnostic indicators, but it is not radically different. Many mental health workers do not have direct experience with a BPD and can be fooled by them because they are very convincing liars and in a clinic setting, they have no problem acting or pretending to be healthy in order to avoid being diagnosed.
It is hard to describe the lying because it is lying that is unlike the way normal people lie. The BPD has the unique ability to believe their own lies and yet they seem to be able (contradictorily) to control their re-writing of reality to avoid being caught or to minimize the risk of the lie being exposed. It is as if they have a strange partial awareness of lying, but one that they can turn on or off. It would not surprise me if a BPD was given a lie detector test that they would pass, even though you could prove that they were lying.
I was married to a BPD and she lied extensively to one therapist, but was still diagnosed as having BPD. However, during the period of preparation for a divorce hearing that therapist was threatened with a lawsuit until she recanted her diagnosis. Other therapists were fooled, but they were not the one living with the BPD day and night and they were not the BPD's victim- which is a person caught in a very extreme case of emotional dependency and extreme levels of frustrating, endless, unsolvable conflict. The thing is, if you marry one of these people, not only are the excruciatingly difficult to live with and artful practitioners of emotional abuse,... they are very, very difficult to get away from. In my case, she launched a series bunch of threats to smear me that were intended to blackmail me into staying with her, it was legal tactics designed to run up the cost of the divorce as high as possible, and when the threats didn't stop me, she tried to follow through with her threats in order to destroy me. She literally attempted to frame me for rape, child molestation, grand larceny, and trafficking child pornography. I was actually scared that she might somehow succeed with these attempts to frame me, and I repeated searched my hotel room to see if she had hired someone to break in and plant evidence among my things (i had a lot of boxes in the room from when i had escaped the house). This is not to cast all borderlines as the same. They are not the same. Some are more severe than others.
One of their tactics in evading responsibility for their abuse is to construct a false analogy between BPD and other types of illness, like Alzheimer's. BPD is not an ailment like Alzheimer's disease, because unlike Alzheimer's victims, BPD's are active manipulative abusers of those close to them. They have a deeply-buried very intense self-hatred that makes them try to force others to meet their endless emotional needs. They want to play on the empathy they can see in others, but they themselves have NO such empathy for their victims. If you are the target or victim of a BPD, they can very charming, flattering, and sweet until you don't deliver the emotional goods... and trust me, nothing you give is enough, ever.The demands become crazier and crazier and the punishments worse and worse. That is nothing like Alzheimer's. The rest of the world should not have to endure their abuse if they can't stop. In my humble opinion they should not marry or have children because they are simply incapable of handling the normal "stress" of an intimate relationship. There have been some successful treatment methods; DBT has had some success, but that treatment takes years and has a low success rate. The more severe BPD will actively fight diagnosis and treatment with all their might, and if they are armed with a knowledge of psychology then they are just that much better equipped to avoid diagnosis by knowing what to say.
One of the problems with BPDs and psychologists is that the mental health professionals don't live with the BPD and are not close in the same way that a BPD's target is intimate. The therapist just won't see what the BPD does. They might get a small glimpse of the BPD's tendencies in a therapy session, but that is nothing. If the BPD is coming to them alone, there is no way to tell what is truth and what is a lie. BPDs lie cleverly at times and they lie stupidly at other times about things that can easily be verified and debunked, like their mom going to prison, but the point is, their entire life is constructed around lies. Really, the only way a therapist could get a full view of how evil and nasty a BPD can be would be to put the BPD and their loved ones into something extensively monitored, like John Gottman's "Love Shack," but in a way that BPD would not be aware of the monitoring. Then the mental health professional would see it, although even then, they might not grasp the fullness of the BPD's abuse because a BPD tailors their abuse very closely to their victim. They push buttons on their victims that affect only that victim in that specific way; so a therapist might see it, but not feel the abuse's intensity as much as the victim would feel it. They have a highly-developed "manipulative intelligence" that is foreign to the rest of the us, and they seem to be devoid of any restraining conscience. Unless the therapist is very experienced with treating BPD, they will be easy prey to the BPD's manipulative agenda. My ex went to therapists, but her prime purpose was not to get healthy and admit her problem, no her agenda was to prove to me that she didn't have BPD and that I was to blame instead.
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful.
Filth Written by a Naziesque Analyst.
By Adigun
This book is incredibly offensive. If someone were to write a book called "How to Spot a Mentally Retarded Person" or "How to Spot a Jew" it would NOT be allowed to be on Amazon and I am surprised that this is. BPD, like mental retardation and race, is NOT something a person chooses to be and therefore should NOT be discriminated for. Joe Navarro is not a doctor but something more along the lines of a Nazi investigator who tries to castigate people who have a mental illness. It would be easy to imagine Navarro training SS officers on how to spot a Jewish person in a crowd and how to question them. This is despicable.
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